Have a Party Hair-Do, A Yabba Dair-Do..
Product: Gayla Bobby Pins
Date: 1950
Ever wanted to look like you were headed to a fancy evening soiree when, in fact, all you were doing was playing tennis? Now you can. All it takes is…wait for it…bobby pins!
Yes, magical bobby pins can transform you from sweaty athlete to coiffed princess in seconds. Well, not just any bobby pins, mind you. Only Gayla bobby pins are the ones that will make you feel like you’re wearing a ball gown and diamonds when driving that scorcher down the line. You’ll have a gay-la old time.
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Technorati Tags: antique advertisement, vintage advertising, funny ads, bobby pins
I’ll Have What She’s Having
Product: Listerine
Date: 1962
As the lady in the diner says after Meg Ryan’s famous O performance in When Harry Met Sally, “I’ll have what she’s having.” Honestly, who knew that gargling Listerine could be such a dreamy experience?
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Technorati Tags: vintage advertisement, Listerine, mouthwash, gargle
When White Just Isn’t White Enough
Product: Derma-Royale
Date: 1895
So you have a freckle or two. Maybe a pimple or a blemish. A liver spot? A tan? Don’t pout. Your skin can be lily white again with the miraculous Derma-Royale!
Because like the ad says, “Nothing will cure, clear and whiten the skin so quickly as Derma-Royale.” Its “bleaching” and “brightening” properties (and who doesn’t want bleached skin?) are highly recommended by Physicians with a capital P — so you know it must be good.
And just in case you’re thinking that something so powerful must also be dangerous, never fear! Derma-Royale is “as harmless as dew,” so harmless that a “whole bottle may be drank without the least serious effect.” And since all you have to do is drink it, need it be said that the product is “so simple a child can use it”?
For all you hard-core doubters and nay-sayers, let’s dig into the guarantee. If Derma-Royale does not quickly remove and cure “any case of eczema, pimples, blotches, moth-patches, brown spots, liver spots, blackheads, ugly or muddy skin, unnatural redness, freckles, tan, or any other cutaneous discolorations or blemishes” the company will pay out $500.
What’s that? It must be the sound of a quack being run out of town.
Click to enlarge.
Technorati Tags: antique advertising, vintage advertisement, Derma-Royale, quack cures, quack medicine
Nostrils as Nature Intended
Product: Universal Nebulizer
Date: 1907
The most disturbing thing about this ad is not the close-up of the vaguely obscene Nebulizer, the intimately detailed description of how to use it, or even the placid expression of the woman with one shoved up her nose.
No, the most disturbing thing about this ad is the offer to use the Nebulizer on trial for 10 days and then SEND IT BACK if you don’t like it.
Please tell me they didn’t re-sell the ones that were sent back. Or that they sterilized them. Or something. Please?
Click to enlarge
Technorati Tags: antique advertisement, vintage advertising, Universal Nebulizer, catarrh
